Ringing in the new year with Ron Morey
by Phyllis Bator - Marco Island Sun Times - January 12, 2006
New Year's Eve was one hilarious evening at Capt. Brien's Off The Hook Comedy Club, featuring comedian Ron Morey.
Dressed in a black t-shirt and baseball cap, Morey started talking about the new year while looking over the audience. He decided Bernie Davison, a guest at the club, looked like Vice President Dick Cheney. He tended to refer to Davison from time to time as "Cheney."
This talented comedian had the audience in hysterics, including myself. Morey not only told one story after another without notes, but had great facial expressions, accents, bodily contortions and animations. He's the kind of comedian that to hear him is good, but to see and hear him is great.
Some of the subjects he joked about included bootlegged products, gas prices, sex, his parents, weight, prescription drugs from Canada, pills, the physical anatomy of hyenas, men and Velcro wallets and line dancing, to name only a few.
One his jokes focused on dumping our landfills onto our enemies. "If you mess with America, you become part of our government relocation program. With all the stupid crap we throw away, we'll never run out of ammo," Morey said. "Any nation that harbors terrorists will find their country littered with empty Starbucks cups and Ben Affleck DVDs, I promise."
When he spoke about hyenas and their anatomy, he said he learned about on Animal Planet, a woman in the back yelled out that he was telling the truth. He thanked her for backing him up and stated if anyone had a problem with his jokes, to go to Table 9 and talk to Sandy from Illinois. Everyone laughed.
There was little quiet time as Morey went from one story to another, constant laughter following each tale.
He also went through a visual impression of a face everyone makes when they're backing up their car. It's impossible to describe because you had to see it to truly appreciate it.
The jokes on sex were funny but not obnoxious, which proves a point. You don't have to be gross and use a lot of profanity to be a good comedian. Sure, he said a few minor curse words - as most comedians tend to do - but they were few and far between.
Morey did a little skit on his mother and her Scottish accent. He had the accent down perfectly. Whether she really speaks that way or not is questionable. However, it was very funny, especially when he extended his "r's."
He also went on to talk about terrorists. "Terrorists who blow themselves up are promised to have sex with 72 virgins with complexions like diamonds. If I were an Afghan woman, I would take offense at that and say, 'So if you think I'm zit-faced, you're better off blasting yourself up to get some real action?'" The audience howled.
He later went back to talking about Scottish bedtime stories and how they end. "To this very day," he said in a thick Scottish accent, "the headless ghost, Ian McFarland. They say he still holds wee children when they sleep. Okay lights out!" It was just too funny, especially the last sentence because it was totally unexpected.
After 90 minutes, he ended the show wishing everyone a happy new year.
"Morey was very inventive. I was impressed with his memory, his gestures and his face. He had me captivated," said audience member Bette Davison, a Marco Island resident.
Peggy Koehle, also from Marco Island, said he was a very intelligent comedian and she really enjoyed him.
"He made me laugh. I liked the fact that he was not over the edge and he appealed to the crowd," she stated.
Ron Goth from Colorado said the show was hilarious. "I couldn't stop laughing. Just the faces and different voices and switching back and forth and adapting to the audience, it was like a wave that kept going," he said.
Michael Moccia, another Islander, thought he was sharp. "He did everything simultaneously. He didn't have to hold himself back and just kept going on and on. I think he was terrific."
As Morey and I sat together after the show, people passing by would shout, "Awesome show!" and other positive comments. The interview was just as funny as the show. He's a natural comedian, and - like the Energizer Bunny - he just keeps going and going and going.
Originally from Phoenix, Ariz., Morey started doing standup comedy there 15 years ago. His inspiration for comedy comes not from a famous comedian, but from his father, who wasn't a comedian. But according to Morey, his dad had a way of making light of things.
"That's how I learned the power of making people laugh. My mom might have been depressed about something or feeling down, and my dad had a way of being self-deprecating or joking about the situation," he stated. "I noticed that when I was a kid. For someone who goes from really being down to getting their energies really up, that's a powerful thing."
Morey has performed at almost all of the Improv comedy clubs and Funny Bones as well as a number of USO shows. "I didn't serve, but I figured the least I could do was to entertain the people who were serving. It also gave me the opportunity to see the world."
His view on Marco Island is that he expected everyone to fall asleep by 10 p.m. and the town would close up like a cocoon. A joke, of course.
"It's a challenge to work in front of people you don't know. The crowd is so diverse here. If the older folks have their arms crossed and don't laugh, you know you weren't funny. But I've had a lot of fun here," he concluded.
If Ron Morey is invited back to Off The Hook Comedy Club, try not to miss his show. You have to see him to appreciate him. He was dynamite.
To contact him, e-mail ronmorey@earthlink.net.
The next comedian scheduled at Off The Hook Comedy Club will be Rick Tempesta, a 22-year veteran of the comedy club circuit. He will appear Jan. 12-15. Shows are Thursday through Sunday at 9:30 p.m. Cover charge is $12.
Capt Brien's Seafood & Raw Bar is located at 599 S. Collier Blvd. For reservations, call 389-6900. Visit their Web site for more information, at www.CaptBriens.com.
Phyllis Bator has been involved with music all her life and has been reviewing entertainment for several years. Comments can be sent to her at
phyllisbator@earthlink.net.
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